Whenever Someone Leaves The Philippines...

who doesn't immediately wish they were back home? It happens with everyone. I think we should search long and hard, through all 7,107 of the islands and choose one we can all live on together. I guess there will have to be a screening process though - to make sure everyone gets along. I want to set foot on each and every of those 7,107 islands, even if they are just bumps in the sea or vast expanses of sand and nothing more. 

Would That Really Be Cool?

A conversation I had with my mom yesterday:

Eddie: ...I'm going to need to get a wet suit if I wanna surf in California. The water is supposed to be way cold.

Ma: Yes, you're going to need to get a job too.

E: I know. I'm just scared of getting eaten by sharks haha. But I still want to get real good at surfing

M: That would be cool though...

E: What? Me getting good at surfing?

M: No, you getting eaten by a shark! It would be a first for the family

E: :|

In Memory

Posthumous recognition makes me sick. It takes a death to realize how beautiful or talented someone is? Accolades are placed upon a cold tombstone, with the recipient 6 ft under, hugging their body close for the rest of forever - its just proof that people never live their life to the fullest. Simple, cliche, but its a cliche for a good reason. Even as I type this I think of all the things I'm too scared to say or be a part of. The hypocrisy stings like sea spray to my eyes, but the pain soothes too - realization is the first step, is it not?

When I die, I only want to be remembered by a select few - I don't want intricacies of my life to be available to whoever can open up a magazine or a web page. I think it's safe to say I'm not one to make a big deal out of most things.

Its like how people look up at the night sky - we marvel at the beauty of a graveyard of stars - the lights burn brightest when its too late to appreciate their wonder. Existence, supernova, white dwarf, gone for eternity.  Lost in a black hole of insignificance and unimportance.

I don't care about being remembered too much - I'd rather fade into obscurity than blow up in infamy. Rhyme skills, WHATUP. 

For Those Of You Who Braved (And Survived) Herpes Island

Out here, we don't hear anything,

But the clicking of the rain.

Against the leaves,

And the way each other breathes (but you've got to listen)

Make this home - we've never, we never had one.

Out here, we turn out all the lights.

And sit inside, looking out.

And the bay's still,

She's wearing the night's expression.

Make this home - we've never, we never had one.

We've never, we never had one.

So let's stop calling this a vacation.

(We're just here for two nights)

Count the beats, of your heart

And no city streets, to break up cars

We can lie here...

We want no one! And no one comes!

Every song plays just for us

Make this home - we've never we never had one

So stop calling this a vacation.

- Dog Park by Minus The Bear

Sometimes

"Sometimes in life you are the hero, and sometimes you are the cuckold. Sometimes you're screaming about your worst fears , your most vicious failures. Such is life."

Worn out words

Sorry - I'm tired of using this word until the prints faded and the meaning is useless. Everything I do makes me feel regretful and sorry, when it feels like im the only one using this antiquated word. It feels like a dead language, Latin, who says sorry and means it anymore? Do I? 

Feigning interest, saying things that make me feel like a douchebag. Like im talkng myself up, aim to impress, dress my words up to suppress their meaning, holding back my words and biting my tongue, the taste of blood and unused words that speak the truth more than the dribble im blurting. 

Kwento

In the Philippines, when people want to talk to each other they say, "let's make kwento." My brother hates it, and makes fun of people, saying 'how do you MAKE kwento? Do you just cook it up (with matching hand signals, air-cheffing)?' I actually think its pretty neat. Its making a story with someone, crafting a tale and subsequently a memory with someone you want to make it with. It's including people in your experiences or juicy gossip or whatever. I think that's pretty awesome.